frida

how corny is this? a painting changed my life

as soon as i saw frida kahlos self portrait with the cropped hair in the man suit, i loved it
when i found out about it, it broke my heart. fuck diego rivera.
you think youre passionate, dedicated, and strong? you are shit compared to frida
she is a heeerrrroooo. she is a sad example because you see how much she is willing to settle for just a man. and its pathetic. but she is a hero. even though she loved that fucker til her dying day, i think she is amazing. she could have taken her dignity and walked out forever. and she wouldve been a hero then too but you dont understand. its even harder to- not because you HAVE to (thats pathetic) but because you WANT to humble yourself because you love another human being so much. diego of course loved her but still wanted some slut-ass.

mary heilmann said
i cant think of anything clever to say about art except that i love it that once in a while you fall in love with a thing. you have the same feelings of desire and joy only its not a person its just a thing thats making you feel that way

and i didnt want to, but i loved it.

on my second day in new york, we walked to moma from our hotel. i made my parents go with me but i walked around by myself. we were getting ready to leave after seeing everything (de kooning<3) when i sat down at the macs they have downstairs. i saw the picture of the painting in a book upstairs so i wanted to see if it was still there. i typed frida kahlo and it turns out the only frida painting there was the one i wanted to see. i memorized the location and i told my parents i had to go see it. they went out to the sculpture garden and i walked up the escalator by myself. i cant even describe how anxious i was to see it. my whole body was numb-y like flushed with blood. .. i guess a easier way to describe it would be intense chills EVERYWHERE! i walked with the QUICKNESSSS! all around the floor. IN MY HEAD, the importance of the painting was SPECTACULAR and i never did read the credit line to know the scale and i imagined it would be HUGE for the huge statement it makes. i was getting so nervous, i almost wanted to leave. kind of like, not knowing how the painting was going to react to me.. i walked the floor about 3 times and i never saw it.. and then i did. its tiny. its in a glass case with a bunch of other shit. that initial shock of the size was the first part of it that changed how i felt about a lot of things. her painting about diego would be miniscule to one of diegos murals... why was she so quiet in her rebellion? i stood in front of it for a couple minutes and all the nervousness drained out. instead i focused on her brushstrokes (all visible) and colors and i forgot about what the painting meant to me. i left and i felt like i left all those feelings i had right there in front of it.

i loved that painting. and now im over it. i bought a poster to remember it but getting over it helped me get over a lot of other things too.

thankz gurl